PTSD, the ripple effect, again and again

by Asha

I relive my pain everyday

Every quiet moment again and again and again

It comes to haunt me

I lay in my bed wide awake because I am stuck in a dream I can't escape

As my scary thoughts just grows bigger, my memories now come rushing back

All of my conscience just goes black

I scream within myself

The tears I can't hold back just trickles down with my internal pain.

At times, I feel so ashamed it comes to haunt me again and again.

I sit up and wonder what it truly feels to be happy

to smile once without faking

to not just want to cry all of the time

to know what is like to be hopeful

to live in the now and not in the past again and again

to have a future dream

to see myself happy and truly be happy and not just like a blank screen

to have someone who understands me

to be free from my own mind

to not have this pain I carry everyday

again and again.

 

 

 

Asha

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Finished since 79 days, 17 hours and 47 minutes.